Some Deep Thoughts
Friday, Jul. 20, 2007 1:45 PM
"Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is.
Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.
Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two."
- Captain Corelli's Mandolin
Silver, I left you a comment in yesterday's entry.
I should have mentioned this days ago, but I've been in some kind of a funk. Plus, I wasn't sure if it was in my right to say anything at all. After all, I barely know Dave. But I do know Davy, and I know Davy well. And because I know Davy and love him so much, I care a lot about what may happen to Dave.
You see, Dave is currently in a coma. He was driving home from work when he was hit by a drunk driver. And while I've read the updates about his condition, I still can't seem to grasp or fathom the idea of this happening to somebody. I know deep down he will be okay. I can feel it. I may not know Dave or Amy very well, but I can sense he'll make it out of this. It'll be tough, but I think he's going to survive this.
I am positive that Davy feels like he's floating about in a dream that he's more than ready to wake up from. I am certain that Char and Amy are feeling the same way. And if I had the power in me, I would snap my fingers and make it all go away... make it all go back to the way it's supposed to be. Unfortunately, I don't have that power. I'm only human, after all.
I can't save my childhood friend from the cancer that's eating away at her. I can't promise that Dave is going to wake up and still be the same Dave. I can spin a lot of fancy words around and try to make things better for people, but in the end they are just words.
I've learned a lot over the last two months about life. Granted, a lot of them are the same life lessons that seem to be retaught over and over again... but every time I'm taught them, I leave the experience having gained something new.
The #1 lesson I've learned is that people are lonely. It doesn't matter if you're an elderly man living across the street who has just lost his life companion, a child who goes through life without a single friend, or a young adult who avoids contact with the world outside his bedroom window. The bottom line is, there's a lot of lonely people out there who all seem to be seeking some kind of connection with another person. I just hope that when they find it, it's a connection that lasts and is unbreakable.
There's also a lot of focus on people finding love. I think society has built up this romantic notion of love, causing us to believe that without it we are incomplete. I have met a lot of people searching for a soul mate, someone to fill the void they feel deep inside. And I have met a lot of people who have found someone to fill that void, if only for a fleeting moment. I am guilty of this, as well. I, too, seek to fill a void in my life. I want that partnership just as much as everybody else. I just don't understand why society puts so much emphasis on being in a significant relationship. I don't think a person is incomplete without romantic love. I just think that with it, they are inevitably happier.
Life isn't meant to be mapped out. I've spent years mapping out my life. I always figured that I'd be married with kids by now, living my own version of The American Dream. It was expected of me. It was what I expected of myself. But the truth is, life isn't going to fall into place the way you want it too. It's not going to plant Mr. or Mrs. Right on your doorstep and send you sailing off to the alter so that you can experience some form of marital bliss. It won't always guarantee you the job you want, the lifestyle you seek, or the number of children you may wish to have. And it definitely doesn't guarantee happiness.
Life is what we make of it. It's more about our attitude than anything else. If we go through life with a negative attitude, we're more than likely going to have negative experiences. Shit happens. It happens to everyone. Some people get more shit thrown at them than the next person, but that probably has more to do with our environment and how we choose to react to the experiences happening in our lives. We can't be expected to always let the shit slide off our backs when it happens to us. After all, we're human. Our lives are based purely on emotion. And because of this, we let our emotions control us completely.
I believe friendship is important. How a person treats another person is the foundation of what makes that person who he/she is. Not everyone respects people, not everyone enjoys getting to know the person inside and out, and not everyone is willing to take the time to be kind to someone in need. There are a lot of selfish individuals out there who are only out to satisfy themeselves. It doesn't matter if they're only after sex, if they're only after money, or if they're so wrapped up into their own individual problems that they've lost sight of the billions of other human beings living on this planet.
It would be an awesome thing if every human being was born with equal opportunities, if every single person out there thought of others and not just of themselves, and if society didn't place so many expectations upon us so that we don't feel like failures if we haven't met certain goals by a certain age. It would be a perfect world, a certain type of utopia, if we could erase the events that send our lives into a downward spiral... if we could save our friends and our friends friends from the events that turn their worlds inside out.
The only problem is, the world isn't perfect. It never will be. And as soon as I accept that fact..... well, who knows? Who knows?
