It's not about me.
Wednesday, Dec. 14, 2011 1:21 PM

"It's not about me." - The Purpose Driven Life, Chapter 1.

I've noticed that a lot of people seem to be looking for a purpose to their existence (me included). It's a human condition, something we are born with. We can't help that we ask ourselves this timeless question. It's in our blood. Eventually, we figure out an answer that satisfies us or we keep on asking ourselves the same questions over and over again leaving the world unsatisfied. I'm sure some people just give up asking and come to some sort of acceptance. And I'm sure there are some people who don't even think about it, preferring to bottle up the questions in the back of their minds because.. just what if... the answer is something they don't want to hear or know?

I've also noticed that there's a lot of people out there profiting off of this need. I call those people modern day philosophers because basically all they're doing is pushing people to answer questions we've already been asking ourselves for years. You can search for the meaning and purpose to life online and come across a dozen of these sites. "Ask yourself this..... and I gaurantee you'll find the meaning to your existence." Well, if it was only that easy! But it's not.

Today, I have decided to start reading The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren. It's supposed to take 40 days because you read one chapter a day. At the end of each chapter, it gives you question to ponder over for the rest of the day. So, what I'm doing is reading a chapter and then reflecting here in the diary. I want to see if this book can lead me to some sort of satisfying answer or some sort of acceptance because I'm getting tired of asking myself the same old questions.

As my father would ask me, "what would Kelso say?" And I would respond, "Time will tell."

Now on to Chapter 1, where I've basically just read that life is not about me. It's all about God. This is a statement I'm meant to ponder, but I know if I ponder too hard on it I'm going to come across as someone who is attempting to tear down this point.

Okay. I agree that human beings (well, Americans anyhow) have fallen into selfish mode where it's all about the individual. I am a product of the Me generation, raised by society to think all about myself. "How does it affect me?" "Why do I feel this way?" "What can I do about it?" So it's very hard for me to suddenly agree with this book that it's not about me. It's about God. I'm actually struggling with this concept and it's just the first chapter!

And it's not that it's all about me... but what if you come from a place where you don't believe in God? What if you're a Buddhist or something? How do you suddenly drop everything you know and allow the world to be all about God? I'm not trying to knock God here. I believe in God... but dear God... what if you don't? What do those people do?

The only other problem I have so far is that it's full of scripture. I'm a Catholic, but maybe I'm not a very good Catholic because it feels like I'm being bombarded with "God's word." It's as if the book is saying, "The Bible is complete fact and whatever is written in these pages is your passage to life." Or something like that. I don't mind being talked to about God or religion but for some reason I really don't like reading a bunch of Bible verses. I wonder what kind of person that makes me.

Here's the question I'm supposed to be considering: "In spite of all the advertising around me, how can I remind myself that life is really about living for God, not myself?"

Wow. Okay. I have never been outside of North America so I don't know how much advertising there is in other parts of the world, but this book is definitely targeted for Americans.

Am I not taking this seriously enough? Because I don't like this question very much. I hope I don't get to day 5 and give up on this book just because it's overloaded with deep religious roots or something. I'd like to take it seriously and actually come out with something good at the end of these 40 days. I suppose we'll find out.

As for the question? Maybe I'm looking at it wrong. Maybe.. just maybe... I'm supposed to get rid of the Dr. Pepper, the McD's, the cable television shows and go back to my basic roots. Eat an apple, drink water, and... and what? What did people use to do before television, books, and the internet? All I can think about is work, but I need a computer to do my work. Hmmm... Socialize with people? If you get rid of everything modern.. wouldn't that end all forms of entertainment we're used too? Dang. I'm actually going to have to go off and consider how to live life without modern anemities now. I wonder how hermits do it. Maybe they're insane. Who knows?

Well, enough pondering these thoughts. If I delve any deeper into this matter, I think I'm liable to just depress myself even more. Until tomorrow and the next point to ponder... tally-ho.